i love romcoms

I was probably going to end up watching To All The Boys I Loved Before because, well, I love romantic comedies. I held off, though, because most of my shows are done now and I’m kind of enjoying this quiet and not having so much mental stimulation.

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I fell in love with these two and I’m currently shake down to the marrow

You can watch too much content, apparently.

But everyone was talking about it and reacting on it in Twitter and posting spoilers and stuff so I thought I should get on it now before I never watch it and I’m so glad I did. I was so charmed. I was so taken aback by how I was so affected by it.

I fell in love.

I love romantic comedies because it makes what I’ve never had so real for me. I’ve been single for fourteen years now and only had one date go beyond that one date since 2004. I’ve had two relationships and I realized, I was never really in love with them, and I don’t think they were in love with me either.

I’ve never had a real love story and I’m a romantic.

I think love is wonderful and I’ve always wanted to have what I see in romantic comedies happen for me. As a romantic, I want the meet-cute and the witty lines and the warmth and the affection. I want to be chased (yes, I’m the girl in the fantasies in my head) and I want to be swept off my feet.

It’s why, if forced to say what movie that would be my favorite, I would always say Pride and Prejudice by Joe Wright. I’ve always imagined myself to be Keira Knightley’s Lizzie Bennet. Too smart and too proud for his own good to not see the wonderful man in front of him and it’s those two qualities that attracted him to me in the first place.

But, of course, he has to be as dreamy as Matthew MacFadyen playing Mr. Darcy.

So I was watching To All The Boys I Loved Before just to pass the time in-between writing projects and so that I can see it before the spoilers get too much and I ended up picking my laptop up and bringing it to my bed where I ugly cried in the last 15 minutes of the film.

I love it that Lara Jean is tough but vulnerable and trying to find her way through all those complex emotions. I could see myself in her. In her insecurities and in feeling invisible. I imagine someone like Peter or Josh to be he one to sweep me off my feet. Lara Condor, Noah Centineo, and Israel Broussard (who I remember from Bling Ring) were fantastic, really. So natural and just the right tone for the film.

Dreamy. Peter and Josh were just absolutely dreamy. And you could fall in love with Lara Jean. I loved her immediately.

And these feel-good romantic comedies — they don’t make them anymore. Now I want to watch No Kiss List because they said it’s good too.

I think the world is needing these fantasies because the world is so harsh and cruel. These lovely little fiction keeps us hopeful.

That’s what To All The Boys I Loved Before did for me. It reset the clock and kept me from becoming a cynical, jaded old man. I’m fourteen years single. I can be alone for the rest of my life. I can.

But I don’t want to be. And I am not closing my doors just yet.

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