I arrived last Friday because I was invited to give a talk on screenwriting at the Negros Museum for the FDCP. The FDCP sponsored my trip back home and I asked to stay for the weekend to be with my parents but at the same time, it was a chance for me to get myself psyched to start teaching scriptwriting classes next month.
I was hoping to get a lot of writing done here because I have a desk and a chair and I won’t have distractions while I’m here but there’s just something about Bacolod where all I do is sleep.
I don’t even take naps anymore and haven’t done so in years but when I’m in Bacolod, a sense of lethargy strikes me and I just end up staying in bed the whole time. I don’t get anything done. Next time I plan a trip back to Bacolod, I better not have work pending because I never get it done.
The workshop went well, I think, and I’m sort of happy knowing that I think I make a good teacher. It’s tough being a freelance professional writer, especially if you’re like myself who has become very, very choosy with the projects I take now. Gone are the days when I’ll write just anything that I’m assigned. I don’t have that flexibility anymore. I don’t want to write for just anything. As I grew older, there are some topics and slants that no longer interest me, which means I won’t be able to write those articles or projects well.
And there’s no point putting out work that’s just okay. Knowing that I do well as a teacher — hell! I think I’m a really good instructor — means I have an alternate source of income and I can just really focus on the writing that I want to be doing. And teaching is a stable, reliable income. I really can’t wait for the classes to start so I don’t have to be worrying all the time and spending so much time looking for work and chasing after payments.
The other cute thing about being back in Bacolod for the weekend is hanging out with the cats. They aren’t kittens anymore and they are still characters and it’s kinda cool when they walk up to you in your room, jump in the bed, and cuddle.
I even considered getting a cat for myself in Manila except I really don’t think I should keep a pet when I’m barely at home. I know cats are very independent but I don’t like the idea of always having to think about them in the back of my head when I’m out working.
The whole point about moving back to Manila and living alone was so that I could really just focus on taking care of myself. When I’m around people (or other living things) I end up putting myself second. That has got to stop and so getting a pet, really, is the wrong thing for me to do.
It was good weekend. It’s great to see my parents and my brother, Jubal. But everything slows down in Bacolod for me and I’m frightened of the inertia. I probably wouldn’t be able to handle a whole week visit.
But it’s good to be back home.