still above water

While my resolve has gotten stronger and my path has become clear, I find that my material world has gotten quite bleak and desolate. I’m running out of funds and I am not managing my finances as well as I ought to.

just found this image on the Internet and it feels just right for me at the moment

just found this image on the Internet and it feels just right for me at the moment

Like a duck, I’m above water but you cannot see how quickly my legs are paddling to stay afloat and moving. I finally found the strength inside of me to push forward and stay true to my convictions, but the requirements of the everyday are taking its toll. The problem of a freelancer: the lean season between projects. I know I have a lot of collectibles coming up, I just have to be more patient and they’ll come and I can collect and I’ll be okay.

I just have to make it through the next few days and when the money comes, I’ll be able to normalise and get steady. Stability has never been my expertise but I have always managed, somehow. I am lucky that I am one of those people who gets things when he absolutely needs it. It isn’t for lack of hard work. I think I work hard. It’s just the nature of the job. I could always get a steady job with a steady income; but that’s just going to kill my spirit. No, this is the path I have chosen for myself. Stay true to this path, I’ll find my way out.

If anything, I’m a swimmer. I may not be able to hold my breath very long, underneath the depths, but I always have the strength to rise to the surface again to get enough gasps of air before I plummet down beneath the surface of the waves. But I’m going forward.

I can do this. Just a few more days. And then it will be all okay again.

 

3 thoughts on “still above water

  1. It’s the least I can do… Believe me, I know what it’s like… Ive been on an emptional wreck sometimes but when you decide that life is just too beautiful to dwell in these blips of darkness, you just chin and stand again there is a silver lining at the end.

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