it’s all words; no more words

November is looking to be a hell of a work month for me. Been writing non-stop since November 1 (a lot longer than that, to be exact); I haven’t had the time to really just sit back and relax. It’s type-type-type and think and create and imagine and all of that stuff. I’m so busy and the first week just ended but it seems my whole November has already been blocked off. I’m happy for the work, I’m happy to be busy, I just don’t have the time to rest and enjoy.

story development for a screenplay I’m working on. the index cards are characters and the post its are story elements. that’s how I work now

I love being busy and I love having all this on my plate. I’m writing articles for Juice, doing contractual work for the DOT, writing magazine articles, and trying to get a movie done, or two, and hoping it all adds up and I get to pay my bills, lower my debt, and save.

Lucky for me, I still manage to sleep at nine or ten in the evening and enjoy the peacefulness and quiet of the mornings. I can get a lot of work done when my Dad and my brother are still asleep. I should have learned this whole sleeping-early thing earlier in life. Spent a good twenty years an insomniac, sleeping at the break of dawn if I could help it. I just think of the lost time. I could have been more productive had I done this sooner.

Everyday, there is a new deadline and everyday, I sorta-kinda meet them. I’ve been missing out on some but so far, everything has been coming in on time and I’m thankful for that. Nothing too drastic as to ruin a pretty good track record of being reliable and dependable.

All these words and they don’t stop coming. Thank you, universe, for that.

What has stopped coming are the poems. I remember almost posting one new poem every day or every other day back in August and September — the hell months of 2012. I wonder if there is anything there that I can see; is there a correlation to how beaten and battered I was by those two months that prompted me to reach in and write poems? And now that I’m happy, busy, and that my mind’s awake, the words don’t come. Not in poetry anyway? Or am I just too busy to have a moment to myself to write?

Not all of November is going to be about work, at the very least. There are two events that are coming up that will be all fun and enjoyment, but because of the dates, I have to get my act together and be ready to submit on time so that I can truly enjoy these.

On the third week of November, I’ll be flying off to Singapore for three days; something I’ve planned months ago to watch Sigur Ros. I’ve already bought the tickets, flight booked, and accommodations reserved. I’m going with my friend Kate and we’re going to have a grand time. I love Sigur Ros and to watch them live is going to be so grand. I can’t wait for this. I’m not the biggest fan of Singapore as a city — but I’ll be there with Kate — so I think I’m going to have a good time. It’ll be her first, if ever, and we are watching Sigur Ros. So I’m ready to lose my shit. I’ll admit as much as to say I wish I still took drugs because an open air concert at Fort Canning to the music of Sigur Ros would be the ideal situation to take acid. But that’s a “me” that I’ve outgrown and is no longer prevalent. I’m a changed person. And God knows I’d too fucking scared to get caught taking drugs in Singapore. They’ll hang me, for sure!

And hello? I’m sick! No way. Healthy living, remember?

a photo I took in Baguio back in February, 2009

At the end of the month, I’ve been invited to go up to Baguio to judge a poetry slam. I’ve never judged a poetry slam before. And except for the documentary¬†Louder than a Bomb, I’ve never actually seen a live poetry slam before so this would be an experience. I love poetry (isn’t it obvious) and I’ll be able to take all that I know and love about poetry to judge this event. I’m so excited for it.

Baguio, of course, is freaking freezing right now, and I hate the cold. But the flowers and trees should be in full bloom, and there’ll be fresh air, and the food will be so good and so fresh. I have friends there that I’d love to see and spend time with. I hope to stay for at least three days. I’ll suck it up, cover up, layer, and find a way to enjoy the cold, and just bask in the glory of the mountains and the cold, fresh mountain air.

I’m sure I’ll have a poem or two by the end of the month. I have to. I’d be so disappointed in myself if I don’t.

But for me to truly enjoy both trips, the words have to keep coming and I have to keep writing them down and getting the work out and submitted on time, earlier if needs be. This is going to be a good month, damn it! I’m going to make sure.

It’s time to work it.


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